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What did you welcome into your life in 2006?
What unpleasantness did you get rid of?
How did you transform your home or your self?
A year is never 100% good, so don't just think about the ups & downs; give yourself credit for all the little places where you gave your life a nudge toward the life you want to be living.
Whirl around your home and find some junk that you don't want to have in the place in the year 2007. Get it out the door today.
Shoo, stupid stuff!
It's time for a big letting go. The rich nations have got to say farewell to the strange notion which has gripped us for the last half century and recognize that the suburban life style - with its 2 car garage, its lawns in the desert, its strip malls - is completely unsustainable. More than that though, it isn't even really "the good life".
There's never going to be more oil readily available than there is now. Nor more natural gas, either. Suburbia relies on these, not only for its residents to be able to get to shops or work and to heat their homes, but also to build the homes and the accoutrements associated with this lifestyle.
And it isn't even that great a lifestyle. Do people really form tighter bonds with their neighbors in a suburb than they do in a mixed-use city block or the countryside? Do people in the suburbs feel connected to the communities surrounding their neighborhood? If you have to drive to get to anything, do you feel anything but distanced from the places you move through?
Dorothy J. Gaiter and John Brecher of the Wall Street Journal recommend you quit waiting for some occasion special enough for that most special bottle you've been holding onto for years.
We invented OTBN for a simple reason: All of us, no matter how big or small our wine collections, have that single bottle of wine we simply can never bear to open. Maybe it's from Grandpa's cellar or a trip to Italy or a wedding. We're always going to open it on a special occasion, but no occasion is ever special enough. So it sits. And sits. Then, at some point, we decide we should have opened it years ago and now it's bad anyway, so there's no reason to open it, which gives us an excuse to hang onto it for a few more decades. So OTBN -- which is now always the last Saturday in February -- offers a great opportunity to prepare a special meal, open the bottle and savor the memories.
You can wait until February if you like, but wouldn't tonight be a good enough for a special meal with those closest to you and a farewell to the close of the year over a glass of something fine?
When was the last time you used a printed phone book? And the time before that?
Me, I can't even remember when it was. I look everything up online now. Even if you do use the printed books, though, you probably only need to keep the latest, and only one of it.
Go search around your house and purge all those old phone books to the recycling bin. They take up a bunch of space for very little value these days.
Give yourself some time to be alone and quiet and think today.
Just a cup of tea or a walk or a hot bath and let the roar of December quiet down.
No need to think big thoughts unless you feel like it, just let the low-level noise fade away.
Deep breath, everyone.
Have a midday snooze today.
A walk might be nice at some point too.
And having a conversation with someone more than twice or less than half your age.
"Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight.”
-- Albert Schweitzer
I talk a lot about cleaning up clutter along the way of making my main point about freeing your life of stuff that you don't actually want in it. I find it relaxing now, after steadily whittling away at my Discardian efforts for a few years, to be able to have my house ready for company with less than an hour of tidying up.
It's important to note, though, that your comfort level may be more or less messy than mine. I'm more of a neatnik than the folks in Thursday's New York Times article "Saying Yes To Mess", but much less so than some folks I know with pristine homes and perfectly ordered closets.
What matters in all cases is that there aren't things you don't want, blocking your enjoyment of what you do.
Think of the cottage style garden with flowers spilling out in clumps; embrace your particular mess and ruthlessly prune away any junk that detracts from your happiness.
Even if it's just for a quick cup of coffee and commiseration in the middle of preparing for an influx of guests or twenty minutes on the phone, take a drink from that well of affection and friendship and support.
Make time for the special and the rest can wait.
It's the turning of the year. Days getting longer from here on out.
Find yourself a little sun or a sunlamp today and avoid that Seasonal Affective Disorder. (Yeah, yeah, you Aussies just quit laughin' will ya?)
Mmmm sunshine.
Happy Discardia, gang!
Ze Frank's got a good idea for you - acknowledge that you're made up of many selves with different moods.
Accept that you are who you are, in the mood you're in today. Recalibrate to the current baseline and try to do the things that today's me is best at.
That thing, even that little dumb thing you did a long time ago? Today's a good day to say you're sorry. Flowers optional, but often wildly appreciated.
If you don't want to dredge up old badness, instead make this Appreciation Day and be nice to that person you're feeling a little guilty over.
Two things today:
- Do the mundane things that must be done before December 31st.
For me that's figuring out submitting receipts from health expenses for the past year for my Flexible Spending Plan fund. Always odd how this, with it's great potential for a reimbursement check, gets pushed to the end of my list. Tackle your bureaucracies and take whatever rewards that brings you - even if it's just the relief of being done with the chore.
- Think about an emotional loose end that you could complete.
Perhaps it's having watched the brilliant film Hiroshima Mon Amour this past week that has me musing on the past and that amazing balancing act between the fear of forgetting (and repeating) our horrors & mistakes and the necessity of forgetting in order to live life unparalyzed.
Today would be a perfect day to take a break with a dumb movie you love or watching cartoons or telling knock knock jokes with little kids or going drinking with a big gang of friends dressed in Santa outfits.
:P
Rather than spending a lot of energy building up to an encounter you expect to be tense, go into it with an open mind and be a bit more kind yourself.
Okay, so maybe you and that relative argue every year when you see each other, but maybe this time you could avoid it if you don't spend days in advance practicing your arguments in your head.
Spend less of your time bathing in emotions that exhaust you.
Be gracious.
Forgive.
And if the other person won't melt the ice on their side, just give them (and you) some distance and spare yourselves the scene.
Gosh, are you getting swept up in seasonal social events too? Hope you're having fun and keeping a light heart as you bustle about.
Just remember to drink enough water and try to get a full night's sleep whenever you can.
Also, if you can snatch 20 or 30 minutes alone time now and then to just read some fiction or otherwise kick back without accomplishing anything, do! I find it can charge my batteries enough to get happily through the next round of putting on fancy clothes & uncomfortable shoes.
Happy holidays!
Write a letter to someone you care about.
Take a gift to a friend or neighbor.
Listen to someone who needs to be heard.
Get out of your own head and put your good energy out into the world.
If you have to let go of everything else to get a good hold on this, do it.
Care. Madly, passionately.
Be yourself. There's no such thing as "larger than life"; be fully alive and present and true and it doesn't get more important than that.
Laugh. Loud, long, often.
Smile. And get other people to do it too.
Be kind. Randomly, bewilderingly, unexpectedly, sweetly.
I'll miss you, Leslie. But you won't stop being an inspiration.
Venture, my brave friends, into those dusky recesses under your sinks and set them to rights.
Throw away (bearing in mind local hazardous waste disposal recommendations) ancient cleaning products from beyond the mists of history.
Cast dessicated sponges to the rubbish bin.
Swab out the dust bunnies, and, if they are particularly large, see if you can enlist them in the noble duty of cleaning the floor instead of just lollygagging around on top of it. (Do not hold out much hope of success in that endeavor).
Tidy it up and add to the shopping list any supplies necessary to make it a functioning cleaning supply cupboard again.
My mother made me a scientist without ever intending to. Every other Jewish mother in Brooklyn would ask her child after school, "So? Did you learn anything today?"
But not my mother. "Izzy," she would say, "did you ask a good question today?"
--Isidor Isaac Rabi
Cultivate a practice of learning every day. One great habit to start is to view encounters with difficult people as the best opportunity you may have each day. "What can this person teach me?" is always a good question, and the lesson isn't always a negative example.
I suppose there are folks for whom December and January are not busy months, but I'm not sure I know any.
Since the chaos is descending and won't lift for a bit, take a little time today to smooth your path.
- Renew prescriptions - and check out online or renewals by mail if your pharmacy offers the service.
- Pay bills early or set up automatic payment.
- Look over your calendar for anything else requires special action (e.g. reserving rental cars, buying tickets, finding those tickets you bought a while back, etc.)
Throw out all those spoiled or unappealing things taking up space in your refrigerator.
Rearrange to group similar foods.
Wipe up any spills or sticky spots.
Confirm that anything you're almost out of - that you actually want to be eating more of - is on your shopping list.
Here's a nice little article with more tips on getting and keeping your fridge clean.
Maybe you need to knock an important errand off your list so you quit fretting about it.
Maybe you need to catch up on sleep.
Maybe there's a movie you really really really want to see in the theater.
Maybe you need some time alone to just take care of yourself & relax.
Maybe you want nothing more than to go out to play with your friends.
Whatever it is, give it to yourself. Make your well-being a priority today.
Feeling a little out of touch? Hanging out with a bunch of knowledge junkies at parties and losing some of the references?
If you are wishing for a boost to feel in the swing of things, it's not as hard as you might think to at least get a basic grip on all those names, places and quotations flying around.
1. Read a complete issue of a real newspaper. The New York Times is ideal, especially the Sunday paper. Be sure to go through those sections you wouldn't ordinarily read, be they sports, fashion or business.
2. Read an amusing compendium of trivial popular knowledge. Any of the Mental Floss books are probably good for this, but Cocktail Party Cheat Sheets and What's The Difference are especially suitable.
3. Read a recent issue of the Economist.
4. Read a recent issue of People or Us magazine.
You should be well into the loop now.
Bonus ongoing step:
5. Start reading, or at least skimming, the Wikipedia Today's Featured Article and In the News items.
Call the oldest people you know and chat for a little bit.
Three calls:
- your oldest relative who still talks on the phone
- someone who did you a kindness years ago you're still grateful to
- your oldest bestest friend
:)
Yes! It's music that makes you jump around time! Pick a longer record and go!
Be a cleaning whirlwind and get stuff back into the room it belongs in! Recycling and trash out of the house! Clothes in the hamper! Jackets hung up! Dishes washed!
(What a great album)
I strongly encourage you to try bold new adventures and push yourself in creative ways.
Participate in National Novel Writing Months or the like. Take classes in some new art form or music. Try out new crafts. Make improvements on your home. Start up a topical blog. ;-)
Whatever you decide to do, it can really help you keep it fun if you place some limits on your expectations for it: "Just 30 days". "One semester and I'll drop the class if I'm not liking it for the third session in a row". "I'll see if I can make this one beginner project that is supposed to take about 4 hours". "First I'll just take on replacing curtains and then think about the rest of the remodeling after I see how that goes".
And, of course, the obvious one: "I'll write a post a day about Discardia for one year".
Which brings us to a little reminder about the next Discardia holiday, the 21st of December, 2006, to the 18th of January, 2007. It's a nice long one and a great finale to a wonderful year of thinking about this whole topic in depth.
Over the next couple weeks leading up to this delightfully long Discardian celebration, think about what you'd like to accomplish this time. I'd suggest picking one big goal and then a couple small goals in other areas.
Remember the more challenging areas as you mull this over. When you're going to work on something that's tougher for you, it helps to know you're only trying to make some progress within a finite area for now. Suggestions to consider for your big goals:
- personal relationships that are not going well
- feelings that your creative life is stagnant
- financial bad habits
- eating and/or exercise routines
- overall life goals
The secondary goals should help keep you motivated on the big one by being easier to succeed at them. Pick very finite projects or changes such as home improvements, getting a new haircut, finally setting up a backup routine for your computer, etc. Because you probably won't completely change that big situation, it can help you feel good to have checked a couple things off your list along with making a bit of progress on the harder goal.
Got a holiday party coming up and feeling at a loss about what to wear?
You might be very surprised at just how nice a new dress or tie you can find for $10 or $20 at Ross or some similar discount department store. Remember: it doesn't have to be something you'll wear again and again, just good enough for a few evenings out knockin' 'em dead.
Go get yourself some silky swanky thing that makes you feel all dressed up and face those social occasions with a smug smile.
Sleep in this weekend.
Really, trust me on this. December is about to get really nuts with events and holidays and dealing with people who are all wound up.
For at least an extra hour each morning, opt out. Sleeeeep.
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Family with small children/Morning persons edition:
Go to bed early and good luck in the morning. At least maybe you can hold off on doing anything more than puttering around in your bathrobe.
Are you still holding on to too many old holiday cards and little tiny figurines, toys & knickknacks? Turn them into decorations!
Photograph the ones you want to remember, but don't need to keep, and just put the picture up on Flickr with the story that goes with it.
Then cut out the pretty part of the cards (as Katie describes here), add a little twisted wire loop around the small objects, and thread a bright ribbon to hang them on your mantelpiece, in your windows, on a Christmas tree or from your picture rails.
Put some in your car or purse or backpack to give as a little gift when you visit people or attach them to presents instead of a bow.
At the end of the holidays, box away any you still love to use next year, save the ones you aren't quite ready to toss in a give-to-friends bag, and go hang the rest from parking meters or mailboxes!
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